I am having too much fun putting unnecessary details (WIP)
(stay safe everyone! seriously.)
I have many interesting obsessions...
Love Zapchon <3
Joined on 11/10/18
Posted by X-TNT - January 27th, 2020
I normally don't vent publicly like this, but I feel it should be informed.
For those who aren't aware or didn't see my recent twitter post, just to let you know I'm taking a break from art. It has been stressing me out for a while. My tolerance for errors in art has been decreasing drastically, I've been overcriticizing myself to the point I'd scrap any WIP that is not great at my taste- in short I've been slowly turning into a perfectionist and I hate it. The fact I am actually an impatient artist and I always believed that balancing speed with quality is key to find success in an art career doesn't help neither, my tolerance for errors and other people's criticism has decreased drastically.
Yes, I've dreamed about getting an art-related career in the future.
But I doubted my wish. If I ever actually hop into that career, I must learn how to draw even if I don't want to. Meaning I felt the need to constantly overwork myself. And I'd have to go under people's standards, if I don't draw as they ask, then I won't be paid and I may even be fired. All this time I wanted to be prepared for my dream career- felt pressured to draw stuff for people as much as I could, overworked myself, overcritcized my art, etc. The practice to hop into that job has become a nightmare to me.
If practicing for a career and to please people stresses me out this much, it is better I either take a very long break from it and learn to pace myself. Or as for the career, I choose something else. But I don't know what I'll do. I'm still in high school by the way so I have less than 2 years to figure that out.
Anyways, I hope you understand this and I'm sorry for any disappointments. See you when I'll feel better.
Posted by X-TNT - November 14th, 2019
I've been making a few livestreams over the past weeks, but I never really announced them anywhere outside Twitter and Discord.
It is my pleasure to announce that yes- I will be making more public art streams on Picarto TV. Anyone (who doesn't break my rules) is free to join! Not only my viewers will be able to watch me make art, but all of you are invited to join my incoming discord server, will which used as a voice chat central for my streams. You have an opportunity to hop in VC with me during livestreams. The Picarto stream chat will remain for those who do not wish to join my server.
As for scheduling, my streams can happen at unpredictable times, but I will do my best to inform you of my incoming livestreams on Twitter.
Our stream is happening tomorrow (15 November) at 3 PM EST. See you there!
Posted by X-TNT - October 26th, 2019
WEEZE I know I'm like a week or two late but oh boy.
We finally hit 100+ fans and 120+ followers on Twitter. YEET.
While it is a good idea that I make a celebration drawing for this, I prefer to spend my talent and effort to work on my regular projects... which I hope nobody minds. But I do have a little word I wanted to say for some time.
I wanted to thank you all for sticking around with me since I joined NG. A few of my followers have known me for very long- maybe some have followed me since 2016, the very early times I posted art online on my old Deviantart account. Over the years I've changed a lot. But it is mainly in late 2018 and this year that my art quality is becoming better than it ever was, in such a short amount of time. And I couldn't have done it without you guys. You complimented me- pushing me to not give up. You gave me criticism- giving me knowledge. Damn. I don't know how to express myself ree.
In all seriousness, thank you so much.
We still have a long road ahead!
Posted by X-TNT - August 29th, 2019
Alright, I have no idea how to even start this post-
Anyway. I quit drawing porn. This applies to all fanbases and my own characters- not just Madness specific porn. Also before you panic I want you to understand that there's a difference between nudity and porn. In my own definition, porn is a product specifically made to arouse people and it contains sexual intercourse and maybe even fluids may count towards it (I believe that fluids are an exception my art changes as long as they're not too excessive). As for nudity, it's not specifically made to arouse people and it doesn't contain sexual intercourse or insane amounts of fluids. I'm moving on to nudity rather than keeping up with porn. Nudity feels more chill to draw, while porn makes me feel rushed and can also stress me out if I constantly get the poses wrong.
Some of my friends have told me I have been making too much porn over the months to the point they started believing I am becoming an addict. The 'I do what I want' excuse doesn't really work here anymore. They're kind of right. I used to draw porn a long time ago because I believed it would help me release and forget those dirty thoughts, but no. Instead- it made me feel like I should make more. I also drew porn FOR other people, I wanted people to like what they're seeing. So I don't think I was fully doing this for myself. I felt so much satisfaction whenever I finished drawing a piece of porn and I slap it online, but now... I don't feel as much satisfaction as I used to. So I ask myself, why I am still doing this.
Porn was good for anatomy practice, but was it REALLY reliable? The answer is no. Porn or not, I can still improve my anatomy skills the same amount I did as porn. The content does not matter, but posture of the characters do.
The fact I drew porn also caused drama between some others and myself.
I feel it would be better for me in the long-run. I don't want to risk getting caught by my school or my future profession neither. I already got caught drawing porn once at school 3 years ago, and I admit it, I had huge problems with the school, my family and myself. This year, sometimes I have been secretly drawing porn in my class which is basically a god damn risk to get in trouble by school again. What was worse is that I don't even know why I was unable to hold myself to draw that shit until I get home. Yeah- The Gang Bang ATP pic and the NC Soldat sex was drawn when I was at school, what a surprise.
Another thing I want to tell something else.
I was 16 when I started posting porn on Newgrounds. That entire time.
I'm nearing 17 now, so I guess it should be fine that I post Nudity (M-Rated)... on 24th September.
Yeah, please don't kill me. I'm moving on from it now.
I'm pretty sure Newgrounds moderators are going to kick my ass soon for this.
I don't need to draw porn to satisfy my obsessions, I can just draw a naked ATP without any sexual intercourse or weird fluids and it'll get the job done. I'll still draw M-Nudity content, but I won't be extreme anymore. That's my message for all who follow me. Thank you for reading this.